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第5章 爱是一件奢华而享受的事 (5)

For that which you love most in him may be clearer in his absence, as the mountain to the climber is clearer from the plain.

And let there be no purpose in friendship save the deepening of the spirit.

For love that seeks aught but the disclosure of its own mystery is not love but a net cast forth: and only the unprofitable is caught.

And let your best be for your friend.

If he must know the ebb of your tide, let him know its flood also.

For what is your friend that you should seek him with hours to kill?

Seek him always with hours to live.

For it is his to fill your need, but not your emptiness.

And in the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter, and sharing of pleasures.

For in the dew of little things the heart finds its morning and is refeshed.

一个青年接着说,请为我们谈谈友谊。

他回答道:

你的朋友是对你需求的满足。

他是你带着爱播种,带着感恩之心收获的田地。

他也是你的餐桌,你的壁炉。

当你饥饿时会来到他身边,向他寻求安宁。

当你的朋友倾诉他的心声时,你不要害怕说出自己心中的“不”,也不要隐瞒你心中的“是”。

当他默默无语时,你的心仍可倾听他的心。

因为在友谊的不言而喻中,所有的思想、所有的欲望、所有的期盼,都在无可言喻的欢愉中孕生而共享;

当你和朋友分别时,你也不会悲伤。

因为当他不在身边时,他身上最为你所珍爱的东西会显得更加醒目,就像山峰对于平上的登山者那样显得格外清晰。

不要对你们的友谊别有所图,除了追寻心灵的深耕外。

因为只求表露自我而别无所求的爱,并非真爱,而是撒出的网,捕获的尽是些无益的东西。

奉献你最好的东西,给你的朋友。

若他定要知道你情绪的落潮期,那么,把你的涨潮期一并告诉他。

因为,你若只是为了消磨时光才去寻找朋友,这能算你的朋友吗?

总该邀朋友共享生命才是。

因为朋友要带给你满足的需要,不是填满你的空虚。

在友谊的滋润下恣意欢笑,同享喜悦吧!

因为在细微事物的露珠中,你的心会找到焕发一新的晨曦。

我爱人人,人人爱我

To Love and to Be Loved

特雷莎修女 / Mother Teresa

特雷莎修女(1910—1997),生于欧洲的马其顿,18岁进加尔各答修道院。1948年她走出修道院高墙,开始为世界上最贫穷的人服务;1979年获诺贝尔和平奖,1997年9月5日辞世。“特雷莎妈妈”是一个美丽的名字,被世人用不同的语言表达同一个意思即“爱”。她刻苦善良,以身作则,毕生坚持不懈服务全人类,其功绩令世人深受感动和启发。

It is not enough for us to say, "I love God." But I also have to love my neighbor. St. John says that you are a liar if you say you love God and you don' t love your neighbor. How can you love God whom you do not see, if you do not love your neighbor whom you see, whom you touch, with whom you live? And so it is very important for us to realize that love, to be true, has to hurt. I must be willing to give whatever it takes not to harm other people and, in fact, to do good to them. This requires that I am willing to give until it hurts. Otherwise, there is no true love in me and I bring injustice, not peace, to those around me.

It hurts Jesus to love us. We have been created in his image for greater things, to love and to be loved. We must "put on Christ, " as Scripture tells us. And so we have been created to love as he loves us. Jesus makes himself the hungry one, the naked one, the homeless one, the unwanted one, and he says, "You did it to me." On the last day he will say to those on his right, "whatever you did to the least of these, you did to me, " and he will also say to those on his left, "whatever you neglected to do for the least of these, you neglected to do it for me."

When he was dying on the Cross, Jesus said, "I thirst." Jesus is thirsting for our love, and this is the thirst for everyone, poor and rich alike. We all thirst for the love of others, that they go out of their way to avoid harming us and to do good to us. This is the meaning of true love, to give until it hurts.

仅仅说“我爱上帝”是不够的,我们还必须爱我们的邻居。圣约翰说过,如果你不爱邻居却还说你爱上帝,那你就在撒谎。连耳触目及、伸手可摸的邻居都不爱,你又怎能热爱看不着、听不见的上帝呢?所以,认识到这点十分重要——说句实话,有爱就有伤害。我们应该甘愿倾我所能,以求不伤害他人,事实上这样就是在对他人行善。这也就要求我们心甘情愿地付出,遭受痛苦也在所不惜。否则,我们心中就不会有真爱,我们所带给周围人们的就不是安宁,而是不公正。

因爱着我们,耶稣也是痛苦的。上帝按照自己的形象创造我们,是让我们去成就更伟大的事业,是让我们做到“我爱人人,人人爱我”。正如文中训导的那样,我们必须“所作所为向基督看齐”。上帝因此创造我们,教我们像他爱我们一样去爱别人。耶稣让自己忍饥挨饿,让自己赤身裸体,让自己无家可归,让自己遭人躲闪。他说:“你是这样对待我的。”到了最后的审判日,他将对在他右边的人说:“你对这些人中最卑微的人所做的事情,就是对我做的事情。”他还将对在他左边的人说:“你忽视了为这些人中最卑微者做的什么,就等于忽视了为我做的事。”

在十字架上生命即逝的时刻,他还说:“我渴望。”耶稣渴望的是我们的爱,是对全天下不分贵贱的苍生的爱。我们每个人都渴望得到别人的爱,渴望别人小心翼翼而不将我们伤害,都渴望自己得到善待。不惜痛苦地去施爱吧,这就是真爱的意义。

我的母亲

This Was My Mother

马克·吐温 / Mark Twain

马克·吐温(1835—1910),美国杰出的小说家,美国文学史上最重要的作家之一,也是美国文学史上第一个用口语进行写作的作家,开创了一代文风,被福克纳称为“美国文学之父”。马克·吐温幼年家境贫寒,被迫放弃学业外出谋生。丰富的生活历对他后期的创作影响很大。19世纪70年代到90年代是他创作的鼎盛时期,其代表作有《哈克贝利·费恩历险记》和它的姊妹篇《汤姆·索亚历险记》等。

She was 82 and living in Keoluk when, unaccountably, she insisted upon attending a convention of old settlers of the Mississippi Valley. All the way there, and it was some distance, she was young again with excitement and eagerness. At the hotel she asked immediately for Dr. Barrett, of St. Louis. He had left for home that morning and would not be back, she was told. She turned away, the fire all gone from her, and asked to go home. Once there she sat silent and thinking for many days, then told us that when she was 18 she had loved a young medical student with all her heart. There was a misunderstanding and he left the country; she had immediately married, to show him that she did not care. She had never seen him since and then she had read in a newspaper that he was going to attend the old settlers' convention." Only three hours before we reached that hotel he had been there," she mourned.

She had kept that pathetic burden in her heart 64 years without any of us suspecting it. Before the year was out, her memory began to fail. She would write letters to school-mates who had been dead 40 years and wonder why they never answered. Four years later she died.

当时她82岁,住在克勒克城,不知为何,她坚持要参加密西西比河谷的老居民大会。路途有点远,但是,一路上兴奋热切的心情仿佛使她又回到年轻时代。她一到旅馆,便立即打听从圣路易来的巴雷特医生的消息。得知他当天早上就回家了,而且不再回来,她兴致全无,调头便要回家。回到家她默默地坐着,沉思了几天后,才告诉我们,18岁时她曾衷心爱过一位学医的青年学生。不料发生了一次误会,他出国了,而她闪电般地结婚,以示她毫不在乎。从那以后她再也没有见过他,然而,她从报纸上得知他将参加今年的老居民大会。“要是早到三小时,我就能在旅店见到他了。”她叹息道。

她把这份情感的重负藏在心里长达64年之久,始终不让我们任何人猜测到。那年快结束时,她的记忆力开始衰退。她写信给已过世40年的老同学,而不明白她们为什么从不回信。四年之后她就去世了。