RULES FOR CONVERSATION
1.THAT conversation may answer the ends for which it was designed，the parties who are to join in it must come together with a determined resolution to please and to be pleased.If a man feels that an east wind has rendered him dull and sulky，he should，by all means，stay at home till the wind changes，and not be troublesome to his friends；for dullness is infectious，and one sour face will make many，as one cheerful countenance is soon productive of others.If two gentlemen desire to quarrel，it should not be done in a company met to enjoy the pleasures of conversation.It is obvious，that he who is about to form a conversation party，should be careful to invite men of congenial minds，and of similar ideas respecting the entertainment of which they are to partake，and to which they must contribute.
2.With gloomy persons，gloomy topics likewise should be （as，indeed，they will be）excluded，such as ill-health，bad weather，bad news，or foreboding of such，etc.To preserve the temper calm and pleasant，it is of unspeakable importance that we always accustom ourselves，through life，to make the best of things：to view them on their bright side，and so represent them to others，for our mutual comfort and encouragement.Few things （especially if as Christians，we take the other world into account）but have a bright side；diligence and practice will easily find it.Perhaps there is no circumstance better calculated than this to render conversation equally pleasing and profitable.
3.In the conduct of it，be not eager to interrupt others，or uneasy at being yourself interrupted，since you speak either to amuse or instructthe company，or to receive those benefits from it.Give all，therefore，leave to speak in turn.Hear with patience，and answer with precision.Inattention is ill-manners：it shows contempt，and contempt is never forgiven.Trouble not the company with your own private concerns，as you do not love to be troubled with those of others.Yours are as little to them as theirs are to you.You will need no other rule whereby to judge of this matter.
4.Contrive，but with dexterity and propriety，that each person may have an opportunity of discoursing on the subject with which he is best acquainted.He will be pleased，and you will be informed.By observing this rule，every one has it in his power to assist in rendering conversation agreeable；since，though he may not choose or be qualified to say much himself，he can propose questions to those who are able to answer them.
5.Avoid stories，unless short，pointed，and quite apropos.“He who deals in them，”says Swift，“must either have a very large stock，or a good memory，or must often change his company.”Some have a set of them strung together like onions；they take possession of the conversation by an early introduction of one，and then you must have the whole rope，and there is an end of every thing else，perhaps，for that meeting，though you may have heard all，twenty times before.
6.Talk often，but not long.The talent of haranguing in private company is insupportable.Senators and barristers are apt to be guilty of this fault；and members who never harangue in the house，will often do it out of the house.If the majority of the company be naturally silent or cautious，the conversation will flag，unless it be often renewed by one among them，who can start new subjects.Forbear，however，if possible，to broach a second before the first is out，lest your stock should not last，and you should be obliged to come back to the old barrel.There are those that will repeatedly cross upon，and break into，the conversation with a fresh topic，till they have touched upon all and exhausted none.Economy here is necessary for most people.