We were given a private room in which to wait through the interminable hours. I suggested to the staff that，when a person is anesthetized，his family should be，too，so they wouldn，t have to endure watching a clock that has surely stopped running，listening for a phone that does not ring，and imagining worst-case scenarios.
In my darkest moment，I felt deep inside that he would not survive the surgery. How could a person survive a chest being cracked open，the heart exposed and fiddled with，other organs shoved aside？ I knew，rationally，that thousands of open heart surgeries were performed daily， with outstanding results. But that happened to other people，not my husband.
I sank into the pit of despair，believing I，d soon be receiving terrible news. I didn，t mention my fear to my companions. Just when I，d surrendered all hope of a good outcome，I was overwhelmed by a sense of warmth and peace. It was astounding！ I felt hugged and consoled and surrounded by love as I remembered that many people were praying for us. And I instantly knew hope，just as surely and strongly as I，d earlier known hopelessness.
Soon the surgeon was at the door，bringing good news-the surgery had been successful. He expected my husband to make a full and speedy recovery. He reached out to shake my hand and as I felt his warm，firm grip，I became aware of what I was doing. I was holding his hand-a hand which，just a short while ago，had held my husband，s heart！
I looked into his eyes and，with tears streaming down my face，I enfolded his hands in both of mine. In all the years，my husband and I have known one another，through all of the physical closeness we，ve shared，I，ve never experienced with him the intimacy that the man before me had when he held my husband，s beating heart.
After my husband was brought to CCU，we began the long wait for him to awaken. Everything went according to plan and，when he eventually opened his eyes and asked what time it was. He said：“No way！”What had been the longest day of my life had sped by in a nanosecond of deepest darkness for him.
As part of their recovery，open heart surgery patients are given pillows to grasp tightly to their chests when moving，coughing，or sneezing. This is to prevent any damage to the incisions， and to lessen the pain of any of those activities. When my husband was presented with his bright red pillow and instructed to hug it tightly to his chest，he pointed to me as he asked the nurse，“Can I hug her instead？”From that moment on，I knew he was going to be just fine，and he was the talk of the unit because news of his sweet question spread quickly as the nurses shared the story.
The bright red pillow made numerous trips up and down the hallway. At first，the walks were brief and slow. Soon the walks were longer and at a quicker pace. Five days after the surgery，we returned home. The bright red pillow accompanied us on walks around our neighborhood as my husband gained strength，stamina and confidence. His recovery was uneventful and complete.
That was four years ago. Occasionally，I，ll spot the bright red pillow in the corner of our closet. I always pick it up and hold it close to my chest. I close my eyes and remember the day I became aware of the power of grace and goodness，and what it felt like to hold the hand of the man who had held，and healed，my husband，s heart.
事情突然降临到我们身上。前一天，我们还过着安静、快乐的普通生活。第二天，我和丈夫却要面对情况极其 危急的心脏搭桥手术。
我丈夫没有告诉过我几个月前他曾经出现呼吸短促的情况，更没有提及他出差在外时曾经去过医院急诊室。当 他的健康状况真正敲起严重警钟时，他才最终向我坦白，并叫我尽快与医生预约。那时候，我才知道他的病情 严重，因为男人虽然可能天性好玩乐观，但是从来不爱“给医生检查一下”。
检查显示，我丈夫其中一条动脉有90%被阻塞，而另外两条动脉也出现严重阻塞现象。医生还提到了“寡妇制造 者”一词。还没开始真正应对所发生的事情，我们便在一个早晨早早地来到了萨凡纳医院。他正在做手术前准 备，而我做着我学过的每一个祷告，慢慢地自己也想出一些新的祷告。我最好的朋友和我的一个儿子陪伴着我。
医院提供一个私人房间使我们度过漫长的等待。我向医院的员工建议说，病人被麻醉时，他的家人也应该被麻 醉，这样，他们便不用去忍受这一切：盯着一个就像停止了走动的时钟，守候着一个不会响起的电话，并且想 象着最坏的情况。
在我感到最灰暗的时刻，我深感丈夫的手术不会成功。一个人的胸膛被敲开，心脏暴露在外被倒腾，其他器官 被推挤到一边，这样一来他还怎么能够存活呢？我知道，从理性角度看，每天都进行着成千上万例心脏手术，而且手术也很成功。但那发生在其他人身上，而不是我的丈夫。
我陷入了绝望的深渊，并相信不久便会收到坏消息。我没有向我的同伴提及我的恐惧。正当我要放弃对一个好 结果的所有希望时，我被一股温暖及平和所包围。那是一种相当惊人的感觉！当我回想起有许多人在为我们祈 祷时，我感到自己被爱拥抱着、安慰着、环绕着。我立即充满希望，就像之前的绝望一样肯定而强烈。
不久，外科医生出现在门前，带来了好消息——手术很成功。他预期我丈夫会快速恢复健康。他走上前与我握 手，当我感觉到他那温暖而有力的一握时，我意识到自己正在做什么。我正握着他的手——那只手，就在不久 之前，曾经捧着我丈夫的心脏！
我望着他的眼睛，眼泪顺着脸颊流下来。我用自己的双手握着他的双手。在我与丈夫认识的这些年里，我们共 同拥有过各种亲密的身体接触，但都不同于眼前这一握，那是一只捧过我丈夫跳动着的心脏的手啊！
当我丈夫被送进冠心病监护病房后，我们开始了漫长的等待，等他醒过来。一切事情都在按着计划进行，最终 他睁开了眼睛，并询问当时的时间。（听到我们的回答）他说：“不可能！”我生命中最漫长的一天，对他而 言，就像以纳秒速度飞过的一缕深深黑暗。
作为康复过程的一部分，做了心脏手术的病人都会有一个枕头，在移动、咳嗽或者打喷嚏时，要将它紧搂在胸 前。这是为了避免对切口造成任何伤害，并且减轻那些动作带来的痛楚。当我丈夫抱着他那亮红色的枕头，接 受如何将枕头紧紧捂在胸口的指导时，他指着我，问护士：“我可以改为抱她吗？”从那一刻开始，我知道，他会好起来的。他也因此成了整个病房谈论的话题，因为护士们很快就把他那甜蜜的发问传开了。
那亮红色的枕头来来回回在走廊里出现了无数次。一开始，走得不远也走得缓慢。很快，步行时间变得更长，步伐也快了起来。手术后第五天，我们回到家里。那个亮红色的枕头继续陪伴我们走过社区各处，我丈夫慢慢 重获力量、精力及自信。他顺利地完全康复了。
事情已经过去四年了。偶尔，我会看看放在我们橱柜一角的那个亮红色枕头。我总会拿起它，把它贴近胸口。我闭上眼睛，回忆起让我意识到感恩祈祷及善良的力量的那一天，想起握着那只曾经捧着并治愈我丈夫心脏的 手的感觉。
surgery
【释义】n. 外科；外科手术；手术室；诊疗室
【短语】general surgery 普通外科；cosmetic surgery 整容手术
sufficiently
【释义】adv. 充分地；足够地
【短语】sufficiently strong 足够强壮的；sufficiently developed 充分发育
interminable
【释义】adj. 冗长的；无止尽的
【短语】interminable conference 冗长的会议
scenario
【释义】n. 方案；情节；剧本
【短语】scenario status 场景运行状态；scenario testing情景测试
incision
【释义】n. 切口；雕刻，切割；切开
【短语】courageous incisions 勇敢坚硬的；surgical incisions 手术切口
accompany
【释义】vt. 陪伴，伴随；伴奏 vi. 伴奏，伴唱
【短语】accompany with 伴随着，陪……同行；accompany by随行，伴奏
stamina
【释义】n. 毅力；精力；活力；持久力
【短语】good stamina 好的耐力；unlimited stamina无限的耐力，无限体力
uneventful
【释义】adj. 平凡的；平静无事的
【短语】an uneventful life 平静的生活
The Memory Box/ 记忆的盒子
After having been settled in our new home for almost a year，I decided to finish unpacking the last few boxes. Hidden low in the stack was a box simply marked“Nick”. Excitement jolted my empty-nest heart upon seeing the name of my eldest son，who now lives eleven hundred miles away.
Delighted，I spent hours poring through the artwork，awards and report cards that propped my memory door wide open and let the days of his childhood come home.