我完全愿意将我已占据好久的一隅之地让出,让另外一个人走出来。我已经不会在意别人对我的看法。他们可以欢迎我,也可以忽视我。要是他们看来还喜爱我,我就会非常高兴;要是我知道他们不喜欢我,我也不会垂头丧气。
I have long known that there is something in me that antagonizes antagonize vt.敌对, 对抗 certain persons; I think it very natural, no one can like everyone; and their ill will interests rather than discomposes discompose v.不安 me. I am only curious to know what it is in me that is antipathetic antipathetic adj.讨厌的, 嫌恶的, 格格不入的 to them. Nor do I mind what they think of me as a writer.
On the whole I have done what I set out to do, and the rest does not concern me.
I have never much cared for the notoriety notoriety n.恶名, 丑名, 声名狼藉, 远扬的名声 which surrounds the successful writer and which many of us are simple enough to mistake for fame, and I have often wished that I had written under a pseudonym pseudonym n.假名, 笔名 so that I might have passed through the world unnoticed.
我早就明白,在我身上拥有的某种东西使一些人对我充满敌意。我想这是自然而然的,不会有人能讨所有人的喜欢。某些人的敌意,只会引发我的兴趣,不会扰乱我的宁静。我只想知道是我身上的什么东西引发了他们的反感,我也不在意他们对我这样一个作家会有什么想法。
总的来说,我已经做了原本打算要做的,此外我别无牵挂。
我从来都不很在乎缠绕在一个成功作家周围的名气。这种名气,在我们当中有许多比较天真的人却把它错当作是令名、美名。我经常想我从前写作时假如用笔名就好了,那我就可以走过这个世界而不引人注意。
I did indeed write my first novel under one, and only put my own name to it because my publisher warned me that the book might be violently violently adv.猛烈地, 激烈地, 极端地 attacked and I did not wish to hide myself under a madeup name.
I suppose few authors can help cherishing a secret hope that they will not be entirely forgotten the moment they die, and I have occasionally occasionally adv.有时候, 偶尔 amused myself by weighing the chances I have of survival for a brief period…
I have been asked on occasion whether I would like to live my life over again. On the whole it has been a pretty good life, perhaps better than most peoples, but I should see no point in repeating it. It would be as idle as to read again a detectivedetective adj.侦探的 story that you have read before.
我的第一部小说确实是使用了笔名,后来只是由于因为出版商告诫我说,这本书可能会受到猛烈抨击,而我又不肯躲在一个假名背后,这才用上了我的真名。
我想多数作家都会在私下里抱有希望:当他们去世后,不会完全被人所忘记。而我有时也不禁私自忖度并以此自娱——在我死后短时间内有多大的可能不被人遗忘。
曾有人问过我,我是否乐意重过一次原来的生活。总的说来,我这一生还是很不错的,也许比大多数人的更好一些,但是要再来一次,我看那就没有多大意思了。这如同把你以前读过的一本侦探小说再读上一遍那样没有趣味。
But supposing there were such a thing as reincarnationreincarnation n.再投胎, 化身, 再生 , belief in which is explicitly explicitly adv.明白地, 明确地 held by three quarters of the human race, and one could choose whether or no one would enter upon a new life on earth.
I have in the past sometimes thought that I should be willing to try the experiment on experiment on v.对……进行实验 the chance that I might enjoy experiences which circumstances and my own idiosyncrasies idiosyncrasy n.特质, 特性 , spiritual and corporeal corporeal adj.肉体的, 物质的, 有形的 , have prevented me from enjoying, and learn the many things that I have not had the time or the occasion to learn.
But now I should refuse. I have had enough. I neither believe in immortality immortality n.不朽, 不朽的声名 nor desire it.
但是假如真的有转世来生之说(现在四分之三的人类都公开相信此说),这还要看一个人能自由选择他是否乐意在世上再投入一次新生了。
过去有时我的确想过,我很想试一下,也许我会接受一些从前由于具体环境以及我精神上和身体上的特殊之处使我不能享受的体验,或学到从前我没有时间或机会去学习的许多东西。
可现在我不想这样做了,我觉得已经够了。我不相信不朽,也不需要不朽。
I should like to die quickly and painlessly, and I am content to be assured that with my last breath my soul, with its aspirations aspiration n.热望, 渴望 and its weaknesses, will dissolve into dissolve into 溶解[消失]到……中, 溶(解, 化)成 nothingness.
I have taken to heart what Epicurus wrote to Menoeceus: “Become accustomed to the belief that death is nothing to us. For all good and evil consists in sensation, but death is deprivation deprivation n.剥夺 of sensation. And therefore a right understanding that death is nothing to us makes the mortality of life enjoyable, not because it adds to it an infinite span infinite span 无限幅宽 of time, but because it takes away the craving craving n.渴望 for immortality. For there is nothing terrible in life for the man who has truly comprehended that there is nothing terrible in not living.”
我倒乐意死得快点,死得没有痛苦。我也乐于得知随着我的最后一息,我的灵魂和它的希望与弱点在瞬间化成乌有。
我把伊壁鸠鲁写给默纳塞斯的话认真记在心中,他说:“要习惯于这种信念:死亡对我们算不了什么。因为一切善与恶都只存在于感觉,可是死亡使一切感觉都归于消失。所以正确认识死亡对我们算不了什么,这使得生命的灭亡变得愉快了。这并不是因为它增加了一段无限的时间,而是因为它消除了对不朽的渴求。对于一个真正理解了死亡并不惧怕它的人来说,生活中也就别无所惧了。”
成长是一部漫长的历史。成长中,我们总会慢慢长大。人活着的意义,不在于长短,而在于他的张力和宽度。生与死是我们每个活着的人都要面对的课题。快乐是一天,不快乐一天,所以我们就要乐观地生活,把握住人生中每个时段的精彩部分,让它成为记忆的永恒,成为生命的一种定格。精神的自由,是人性的一种解放,是释放着的生命中灿烂的光芒。不囿于生活的圈圈,适时调整自己的心态,勇于面对和敢于承担人生路上的荆棘和颠簸,那么这样正如文中所说的“生活中也就没有什么可怕的了”。