Then secondly, instead of enjoying the pleasures of love and ****** the best of our youth and beauty, we are left to languish far from our husbands, who are all with the army.But say no more of ourselves; what afflicts me is to see our girls growing old in lonely grief.
MAGISTRATE
Don't the men grow old too?
***ISTRATA
That is not the same thing.When the soldier returns from the wars, even though he has white hair, he very soon finds a young wife.But a woman has only one summer; if she does not make hay while the sun shines, no one will afterwards have anything to say to her, and she spends her days consulting oracles that never send her a husband.
MAGISTRATE
But the old man who can still get an erection...
***ISTRATA
But you, why don't you get done with it and die? You are rich;go buy yourself a bier, and I will knead you a honey-cake for Cerberus.Here, take this garland.
(Drenching him with water.)
CLEONICE
And this one too.
(Drenching him with water.)
MYRRHINE
And these fillets.
(Drenching him with water.)
***ISTRATA
What else do you need? Step aboard the boat; Charon is waiting for you, you're keeping him from pushing off.
MAGISTRATE
To treat me so scurvily! What an insult! I will go show myself to my fellow-magistrates just as I am.
***ISTRATA
What! are you blaming us for not having exposed you according to custom? Nay, console yourself; we will not fail to offer up the third-day sacrifice for you, first thing in the morning.
(She goes into the Acropolis, with CLEONICE and MYRRHINE.)LEADER OF CHORUS OF OLD MEN
Awake, friends of *******; let us hold ourselves aye ready to act.
CHORUS OF OLD MEN (singing)
I suspect a mighty peril; I foresee another tyranny like Hippias'.
I am sore afraid the Laconians assembled here with Clisthenes have, by a stratagem of war, stirred up these women, enemies of the gods, to seize upon our treasury and the funds whereby I lived.
LEADER OF CHORUS OF OLD MEN
Is it not a sin and a shame for them to interfere in advising the citizens, to prate of shields and lances, and to ally themselves with Laconians, fellows I trust no more than I would so many famished wolves? The whole thing, my friends, is nothing else but an attempt to re-establish tyranny.But I will never submit; I will be on my guard for the future; I will always carry a blade hidden under myrtle boughs; I will post myself in the public square under arms, shoulder to shoulder with Aristogiton; and now, to make a start, Imust just break a few of that cursed old jade's teeth yonder.
LEADER OF CHORUS OF WOMEN
Nay, never play the brave man, else when you go back home, your own mother won't know you.But, dear friends and allies, first let us lay our burdens down.
CHORUS OF WOMEN (singing)
Then, citizens all, hear what I have to say.I have useful counsel to give our city, which deserves it well at my hands for the brilliant distinctions it has lavished on my girlhood.At seven years of age, I carried the sacred vessels; at ten, I pounded barley for the altar of Athene; next, clad in a robe of yellow silk, I played the bear to Artemis at the Brauronia; presently, when I was grown up, a tall, handsome maiden, they put a necklace of dried figs about my neck, and I was one of the Canephori.
LEADER OF CHORUS OF WOMEN
So surely I am bound to give my best advice to Athens.What matters that I was born a woman, if I can cure your misfortunes? I pay my share of tolls and taxes, by giving men to the State.But you, you miserable greybeards, you contribute nothing to the public charges; on the contrary, you have wasted the treasure of our forefathers, as it was called, the treasure amassed in the days of the Persian Wars.You pay nothing at all in return; and into the bargain you endanger our lives and liberties by your mistakes.Have you one word to say for yourselves?...Ah! don't irritate me, you there, or I'll lay my slipper across your jaws; and it's pretty heavy.
CHORUS OF OLD MEN (singing)
Outrage upon outrage! things are going from bad to worse.Let us punish the minxes, every one of us that has balls to boast of.Come, off with our tunics, for a man must savour of manhood; come, my friends, let us strip naked from head to foot.Courage, I say, we who in our day garrisoned Lipsydrion; let us be young again, and shake off eld.
LEADER OF CHORUS OF OLD MEN
If we give them the least hold over us, that's the end! their audacity will know no bounds! We shall see them building ships, and fighting sea-fights, like Artemisia; and, if they want to mount and ride as cavalry, we had best cashier the knights, for indeed women excel in riding, and have a fine.firm seat for the gallop.Just think of all those squadrons of Amazons Micon has painted for us engaged in hand-to-hand combat with men.Come then, we must now fit collars to all these willing necks.
CHORUS OF WOMEN (singing)
By the blessed goddesses, if you anger me, I will let loose the beast of my evil passions, and a very hailstorm of blows will set you yelling for help.Come, dames, off with your tunics, and quick's the word; women must smell the smell of women in the throes of passion....Now just you dare to measure strength with me, old greybeard, and I warrant you you'll never eat garlic or black beans any more.No, not a word! my anger is at boiling point, and I'll do with you what the beetle did with the eagle's eggs.
LEADER OF CHORUS OF WOMEN
I laugh at your threats, so long as I have on my side Lampito here, and the noble Theban, my dear Ismenia....Pass decree on decree, you can do us no hurt, you wretch abhorred of all your fellows.Why, only yesterday, on occasion of the feast of Hecate, I asked my neighbours of Boeotia for one of their daughters for whom my girls have a lively liking -a fine, fat eel to wit; and if they did not refuse, all along of your silly decrees! We shall never cease to suffer the like, till some one gives you a neat trip-up and breaks your neck for you! (To ***ISTRATA as she comes out from the Acropolis) You, Lysistrata, you who are leader of our glorious enterprise, why do I see you coming towards me with so gloomy an air?
***ISTRATA