MORE CONFESSIONS.
The fancy, at first so painful, that Mdlle.de Cardoville was informed of her love for Agricola was soon exchanged in the hunchbacks heart, thanks to the generous instincts of that rare and excellent creature, for a touching regret, which showed all her attachment and veneration for Adrienne.
"Perhaps," said Mother Bunch to herself, "conquered by the influence of the adorable kindness of my protectress, I might have made to her a confession which I could make to none other, and revealed a secret which I thought to carry with me to my grave.It would, at least, have been a mark of gratitude to Mdlle.de Cardoville; but, unfortunately, I am now deprived of the sad comfort of confiding my only secret to my benefactress.And then--however generous may be her pity for me, however intelligent her affection, she cannot--she, that is so fair and so much admired--she cannot understand how frightful is the position of a creature like myself, hiding in the depth of a wounded heart, a love at once hopeless and ridiculous.No, no--in spite of the delicacy of her attachment, my benefactress must unconsciously hurt my feelings, even whilst she pities me--for only sympathetic sorrows can console each other.Alas! why did she not leave me to die?"
These reflections presented themselves to the thinker's mind as rapidly as thought could travel.Adrienne observed her attentively; she remarked that the sewing-girl's countenance, which had lately brightened up, was again clouded, and expressed a feeling of painful humiliation.Terrified at this relapse into gloomy dejection, the consequences of which might be serious, for Mother Bunch was still very weak, and, as it were, hovering on the brink of the grave, Mdlle.de Cardoville resumed hastily: "My friend, do not you think with me, that the most cruel and humiliating grief admits of consolation, when it can be entrusted to a faithful and devoted heart?"
"Yes, lady," said the young sempstress, bitterly; "but the heart which suffers in silence, should be the only judge of the moment for ****** so painful a confession.Until then, it would perhaps be more humane to respect its fatal secret, even if one had by chance discovered it."
"You are right, my child," said Adrienne, sorrowfully, "if I choose this solemn moment to entrust you with a very painful secret, it is that, when you have heard me, I am sure you will set more value on your life, as knowing how much I need your tenderness, consolation, and pity."
At these words, the other half raised herself on the mattress, and looked at Mdlle.de Cardoville in amazement.She could scarcely believe what she heard; far from designing to intrude upon her confidence, it was her protectress who was to make the painful confession, and who came to implore pity and consolation from her!
"What!" stammered she; "you, lady!"
"I come to tell you that I suffer, and am ashamed of my sufferings.
Yes," added the young lady, with a touching expression, "yes--of all confessions, I am about to make the most painful--I love--and I blush for my love."
"Like myself!" cried Mother Bunch, involuntarily, clasping her hands together.
"I love," resumed Adrienne, with a long-pent-up grief; "I love, and am not beloved--and my love is miserable, is impossible--it consumes me--it kills me--and I dare not confide to any one the fatal secret!"
"Like me," repeated the other, with a fixed look."She--a queen in beauty, rank, wealth, intelligence--suffers like me.Like me, poor unfortunate creature! she loves, and is not loved again."
"Well, yes! like you, I love and am not loved again," cried Mdlle.de Cardoville; "was I wrong in saying, that to you alone I could confide my secret--because, having suffered the same pangs, you alone can pity them?"
"Then, lady," said Mother Bunch, casting down her eyes, and recovering from her first amazement, "you knew--"
"I knew all, my poor child--but never should I have mentioned your secret, had I not had one to entrust you with, of a still more painful nature.Yours is cruel, but mine is humiliating.Oh, my sister!" added Mdlle.de Cardoville, in a tone impossible to describe, "misfortune, you, see, blends and confounds together what are called distinctions of rank and fortune--and often those whom the world envies are reduced by suffering far below the poorest and most humble, and have to seek from the latter pity and consolation."
Then, drying her tears, which nosy flowed abundantly, Mdlle.de Cardoville resumed, in a voice of emotion: "Come, sister! courage, courage! let us love and sustain each other.Let this sad and mysterious bond unite us forever."
"Oh, lady! forgive me.But now that you know the secret of my life,"
said the workgirl, casting down her eyes, and unable to vanquish her confusion, "it seems to me, that I can never look at you without blushing."
"And why? because you love Agricola?" said Adrienne."Then I must die of shame before you, since, less courageous than you, I had not the strength to suffer and be resigned, and so conceal my love in the depths of my heart.He that I love, with a love henceforth deprived of hope, knew of that love and despised it--preferring to me a woman, the very choice of whom was a new and grievous insult, if I am not much deceived by appearances.I sometimes hope that I am deceived on this point.Now tell me--is it for you to blush?"
"Alas, lady! who could tell you all this?"