"'No, sir,' answered the girl; 'he doesn't look the sort that would have a card. He's not a gentleman, sir; but he says you'll know him.' She evidently regarded the statement as an aspersion upon myself.
"I was about to tell her to say I was out, when the recollection of Smythe's other self flashed into my mind, and I directed her to send him up.
"A minute passed, and then he entered. He was wearing a new suit of a louder pattern, if possible, than before. I think he must have designed it himself. He looked hot and greasy. He did not offer to shake hands, but sat down awkwardly on the extreme edge of a small chair, and gaped about the room as if he had never seen it before.
"He communicated his shyness to myself. I could not think what to say, and we sat for a while in painful silence.
"'Well,' I said, at last, plunging head-foremost into the matter, according to the method of shy people, 'and how's 'Liza?'
"'Oh, SHE'S all right,' he replied, keeping his eyes fixed on his hat.
"'Have you done it?' I continued.
"'Done wot?' he asked, looking up.
"'Married her.'
"'No,' he answered, returning to the contemplation of his hat.
"'Has she refused you then?' I said.
"'I ain't arst 'er,' he returned.
He seemed unwilling to explain matters of his own accord. I had to put the conversation into the form of a cross-examination.
"'Why not?' I asked; 'don't you think she cares for you any longer?'
He burst into a harsh laugh. 'There ain't much fear o' that,' he said; 'it's like 'aving an Alcock's porous plaster mashed on yer, blowed if it ain't. There's no gettin' rid of 'er. I wish she'd giv' somebody else a turn. I'm fair sick of 'er.'
"'But you were enthusiastic about her a month ago!' I exclaimed in astonishment.
"'Smythe may 'ave been,' he said; 'there ain't no accounting for that ninny, 'is 'ead's full of starch. Anyhow, I don't take 'er on while I'm myself. I'm too jolly fly.'
"'That sort o' gal's all right enough to lark with,' he continued;'but yer don't want to marry 'em. They don't do yer no good. A man wants a wife as 'e can respect--some one as is a cut above 'imself, as will raise 'im up a peg or two--some one as 'e can look up to and worship. A man's wife orter be to 'im a gawddess--a hangel, a--'
"'You appear to have met the lady,' I remarked, interrupting him.
"He blushed scarlet, and became suddenly absorbed in the pattern of the carpet. But the next moment he looked up again, and his face seemed literally transformed.
"'Oh! Mr. MacShaughnassy,' he burst out, with a ring of genuine manliness in his voice, 'you don't know 'ow good, 'ow beautiful she is. I ain't fit to breathe 'er name in my thoughts. An' she's so clever. I met 'er at that Toynbee 'All. There was a party of toffs there all together. You would 'ave enjoyed it, Mr. MacShaughnassy, if you could 'ave 'eard 'er; she was makin' fun of the pictures and the people round about to 'er pa--such wit, such learnin', such 'aughtiness. I follered them out and opened the carriage door for 'er, and she just drew 'er skirt aside and looked at me as if I was the dirt in the road. I wish I was, for then perhaps one day I'd kiss 'er feet.'
"His emotion was so genuine that I did not feel inclined to laugh at him. 'Did you find out who she was?' I asked.
"'Yes,' he answered; 'I 'eard the old gentleman say "'Ome" to the coachman, and I ran after the carriage all the way to 'Arley Street.
Trevior's 'er name, Hedith Trevior.'
"'Miss Trevior!' I cried, 'a tall, dark girl, with untidy hair and rather weak eyes?'
"'Tall and dark,' he replied 'with 'air that seems tryin' to reach 'er lips to kiss 'em, and heyes, light blue, like a Cambridge necktie. A 'undred and seventy-three was the number.'
"'That's right,' I said; 'my dear Smith, this is becoming complicated. You've met the lady and talked to her for half an hour--as Smythe, don't you remember?'
"'No,' he said, after cogitating for a minute, 'carn't say I do; Inever can remember much about Smythe. He allers seems to me like a bad dream.'
"'Well, you met her,' I said; 'I'm positive. I introduced you to her myself, and she confided to me afterwards that she thought you a most charming man.'
"'No--did she?' he remarked, evidently softening in his feelings towards Smythe; 'and did I like 'ER?'
"'Well, to tell the truth,' I answered, 'I don't think you did. You looked intensely bored.'
"'The Juggins,' I heard him mutter to himself, and then he said aloud: 'D'yer think I shall get a chance o' seein' 'er agen, when I'm--when I'm Smythe?'
"'Of course,' I said, 'I'll take you round myself. By the bye,' Iadded, jumping up and looking on the mantelpiece, 'I've got a card for a Cinderella at their place--something to do with a birthday.
Will you be Smythe on November the twentieth?'
"'Ye--as,' he replied; 'oh, yas--bound to be by then.'
"'Very well, then,' I said, 'I'll call round for you at the Albany, and we'll go together.'
"He rose and stood smoothing his hat with his sleeve. 'Fust time I've ever looked for'ard to bein' that hanimated corpse, Smythe,' he said slowly. 'Blowed if I don't try to 'urry it up--'pon my sivey Iwill.'
"'He'll be no good to you till the twentieth,' I reminded him.
'And,' I added, as I stood up to ring the bell, 'you're sure it's a genuine case this time. You won't be going back to 'Liza?'
"'Oh, don't talk 'bout 'Liza in the same breath with Hedith,' he replied, 'it sounds like sacrilege.'
"He stood hesitating with the handle of the door in his hand. At last, opening it and looking very hard at his hat, he said, 'I'm goin' to 'Arley Street now. I walk up and down outside the 'ouse every evening, and sometimes, when there ain't no one lookin', I get a chance to kiss the doorstep.'
"He disappeared, and I returned to my chair.